Archive for State of the State

Mrs. O’Leary should shoot that damn cow Remember learning about the Great Chicago Fire in history class and how 19th century cities were basically tinderboxes on the brink of burning down? That’s pretty much the reality of life in present day Detroit. As we learned during last night’s 85 fires, a little wind and an illegal power hook-up can pretty much burn Detroit to the ground. Also a dangerously... Read more→

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Labor Day in D minor The struggle of the proletariat continues, and this time the songs of the Red Book will be performed in full symphonic orchestration. Because the Detroit Symphony Orchestra is the new battleground in the epic fight to control the means of production. Once they get justice, the bosses will finally respect the working class. Or something. And Lansing anger bear Virg Bernero will... Read more→

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Rick Snyder outsources another job Michigan has four gubernatorial campaigns worth of unemployed Republican flacks. Does famous nerd Rick “Michigan” Snyder hire any of them? Nope. He’s outsourcing work to Democrat Chris DeWitt, genius behind A Whole Lotta People Supporting John Cherry. This is what Lansing anger bear Virg Bernero warned us about. It starts with Michigan Democrats, next he’ll... Read more→

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Free the DPS Four! Noted neo-fascist despot Robert “Bob” Bobb and his jack-booted lackey Kym Worthy launched a full-scale assault upon the sacred right of local control of the Detroit Public Schools, and by extension, the entire diaspora of oppressed peoples. They unjustly indicted Gwendolyn Miller, Eugenia Rose Holimon, Eric Holimon, and Robert Gibson spent DPS money without submitting to bourgeois-capitalist-suburbian... Read more→

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Michigan employers have high standards You people probably still think getting a job is easy. Scrape through high school or get your equivalency, and your old man can get you in at the plant. Look losers, it doesn’t work that way anymore. Because Asians with better math skills will do the same work as you for less money. And they won’t call in “sick” every time they have twelve beers while... Read more→

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Socialist federal government hurts Frank Beckmann’s feelings The Great Voice of Great Lakes Pollution, Frank Beckmann, will not like reading about this. Assuming he possesses the cognitive capacity to read. The government won’t let the God-fearing, patriotic job creators at Enbridge Oil re-open their beloved oil pipeline. Even though said pipeline generously donated oil to the rivers and streams... Read more→

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Michigan’s Grand Old Party about to get crazy up in here Probably you public radio-listening, cage-free organic egg-eating French hippies thought Michigan avoided the tea party crazy because famous nerd Rick “Michigan” Snyder won the Republican nomination. Fools. The teabaggers will probably control the GOP convention this weekend. A teabagger even beat the state GOP chairman in a delegate race.... Read more→

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Rick Michigan makes terribly unimportant choice There is nothing more important than selecting a running mate. Except for almost anything else. But we like to make a big deal when gubernatorial or presidential nominees make their pick because, well, because they usually do it in August and nothing else is going on. Snyder tapped 33-year-old Brian Calley to be his running mate. No one knows much about... Read more→

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Today’s the day the teddy bears have their picnic The Michigan Tea Party party is as poorly executed as any political dirty trick since Gordon Liddy didn’t train Cubans to properly tape a door-latch. Leave aside that everyone attached to this farce is connected to the Democrats or the UAW. Forget they’re the most secretive political party since Millard Fillmore attempted a comeback. Just... Read more→

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