Poor thing, she’s lost her mind. SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "Former hot politician Carey Torrice reduced to postmodernist self-parody", url: "http://dyspathy.com/?p=4127" }); Read More →

By now you’ve heard about the theft of the mayoral vehicle’s wheels. No doubt taken by the same suburbian interests who stole Cobo Hall and DPS. Seriously what the hell people? Who steals Dave Bing’s rims? He seems like a factory-issue wheel kind of guy. Whatever, we can never allow this to happen again. As Mayor Bing himself recently explained, it’s up to citizens to stop crime because God... Read more→

While the Republicans are busy eating their own, the Democrats are holding the boringest political convention since anyone paid attention to the Prohibition Party. Jocelyn Benson and David Leyton were pre-nominated months ago. And everyone loves Lansing anger bear Virg Bernero. Except for Andy Dillon, but he’s probably still on vacation. Anyway, the only remotely exciting thing to happen at the... Read more→

Famous nerd Rick “Michigan” Snyder found himself a nice, outstate conservative to be his running mate, so everyone thought right-wingers would be happy. Everyone forgot that regular ‘Mericans just want their country back. And they won’t put up with these corrupt backroom deals whereby a party’s elected gubernatorial nominee selects his or her running mate, as is the long-standing custom.... Read more→

OMG, Dyspathy headline writing department! Why are you guys so insensitive? Rochelle Riley bravely explained that Dave Bing isn’t right-sizing Detroit. That’s the wrong word. He’s redefining Detroit. After months of transparently secret work with planning guru Toni Griffin, Dave Bing is ready to implement phase one of their plan. As Bing will probably explain to Jim Gray on the ESPN (cable channel... Read more→

The fine folks at the Detroit News’ City Hall Insider blog report that incarcerated felon Kwame Kilpatrick is using the Twitter machine again to relay important messages to Team Kilpatrick supporters. This strategy fits perfectly in Kilpatrick’s new media wheelhouse. After all, many of his fancy sext messages were under 140 characters. For instance: “LOL LOL! Damn that. Never busted. Busted... Read more→

Spray-tanned lawyer creature Geoffrey Fieger is tired of you people ignoring him. So he’s running for mayor. Of Detroit. Or he will, three years from now when there’s an actual election. And because he was born at Harper Hospital, he probably won’t have to move into the city. Geoffrey Fieger is his own anchor baby. Because of the 14th Amendment. Or maybe it doesn’t work that way,... Read more→

OMG! So like Ralph Godbee (who, remember, helped that mean girl Ella Bully-Cummings betray tough-guy-with-a-sensitive-side-once-you-get-to-know-him Jerry Oliver for that other mean girl Christine Beatty)was sexting Warren Evans’ girlfriend Monique Patterson! I know, right? What a jerk. But then Warren Evans shows the sexts to Principal Bing and was like, Coach Green should make me captain... Read more→

Andy Dillon didn’t endorse Virg Bernero at this morning’s Democratic Unity Breakfast. You know, the event specifically designed for losing candidates to endorse their party’s nominees. Maybe Dillon is crazy like Jim Blanchard, who I don’t think ever conceded the 2002 gubernatorial primary. When he finished third. Or perhaps Dillon is Hillary Clinton delusional. He figures he can win West Virginia.... Read more→

Semi-Literate Former Gold Prospector Given Own Cable News Show SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: "Joad Cresbeckler is like a better educated, eloquent version of Frank Beckmann", url: "http://dyspathy.com/?p=3868" }); Read More →