Archive for Big Important News

The fine folks at the Detroit News’ City Hall Insider blog report that incarcerated felon Kwame Kilpatrick is using the Twitter machine again to relay important messages to Team Kilpatrick supporters. This strategy fits perfectly in Kilpatrick’s new media wheelhouse. After all, many of his fancy sext messages were under 140 characters. For instance: “LOL LOL! Damn that. Never busted. Busted... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (11)

Spray-tanned lawyer creature Geoffrey Fieger is tired of you people ignoring him. So he’s running for mayor. Of Detroit. Or he will, three years from now when there’s an actual election. And because he was born at Harper Hospital, he probably won’t have to move into the city. Geoffrey Fieger is his own anchor baby. Because of the 14th Amendment. Or maybe it doesn’t work that way,... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (7)

OMG! So like Ralph Godbee (who, remember, helped that mean girl Ella Bully-Cummings betray tough-guy-with-a-sensitive-side-once-you-get-to-know-him Jerry Oliver for that other mean girl Christine Beatty)was sexting Warren Evans’ girlfriend Monique Patterson! I know, right? What a jerk. But then Warren Evans shows the sexts to Principal Bing and was like, Coach Green should make me captain... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (13)

Andy Dillon didn’t endorse Virg Bernero at this morning’s Democratic Unity Breakfast. You know, the event specifically designed for losing candidates to endorse their party’s nominees. Maybe Dillon is crazy like Jim Blanchard, who I don’t think ever conceded the 2002 gubernatorial primary. When he finished third. Or perhaps Dillon is Hillary Clinton delusional. He figures he can win West Virginia.... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (15)

Semi-Literate Former Gold Prospector Given Own Cable News Show  Read More →

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (3)

Should conservatives vote for Rick “Michigan” Snyder? Consider RightMichigan commenter rdww’s thoughts on the matter: We are in a serious pickle here for 2010. My first thought, on considering the choices for governor, is to say a plague on both the major parties, I’m voting Libertarian. I still may, but I fear this could just be a tantrum, irresponsibly taking my toys and going home.... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (17)

And seeing batshit Sharon McPhail warm up the crowd, like she was the only one left willing to associate with Team Kilpatrick in public? That was probably the sweetest part. (DetNews)  Read More →

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (9)

Sometime tonight (i.e. long after Jack Lessenberry filed his Metro Times column) we will know who the people nominated for governor, and a lot of other stuff. The people are idiots. So let’s elect a governor of Dyspathy to rule our small, but enlightened Internets community. In purely ceremonial fashion. May the least awful candidate win! This election is Chicago-style, so feel free to vote... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (17)

The Otis Mathis case just got real. Turns out—if you believe Mathis’ lawyer—Mathis didn’t rub-n-tug in front of Teresa Gueyser, or write that shockingly competent resignation letter. Mathis’ improbably-named attorney Odie Uddyback says the whole thing was a devious plot to discredit Mathis so Dave Bing could steal Detroit’s precious jewel public schools. Which he will sell to the evil... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (11)

Famous fecal stain Reverend David Murray was in the news again this week, because awful vulgarian (by which I mean honest and capable public servant) Gary Brown said Murray is the face of the Detroit Board of Education. Then Murray held a “NO” sign upside down. It was an interesting week for the Rev. Reverend David Murray, assuming that is his real name. Wait, what? Let me explain. Everyone makes... Read more→

Categories : Big Important News
Comments (12)