Dec
23

Jennifer Granholm’s own private Optimist’s Club, Sam Riddle is dangerous and sexy, and dreams come true for Carey Torrice

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A stopped clock is right twice a day
In the fraternity of governors, Jennifer Granholm is Flounder. She looks at 2010 and is all “oh boy this is gonna be great.” Maybe she doesn’t realize all that stimulus money was a one-time thing and next year’s budget will be hell. Or maybe she doesn’t care. If you keep saying things will be better tomorrow, one day you’ll probably be right. And on that day most of the unwashed masses will forget about all those previous days you lied to them. (Freep)

Michigan parties like it’s 1999

This wretched decade is finally over. May it die a horrible, painful death. Demographically we must have known these last ten years were the worst thing imaginable because our population returned to 1999 levels. For the first time in a decade, Michigan’s population has fallen below 10,000,000 people. Nostalgia! (DetNews)

Women love a dangerous man
Magistrate Renee McDuffee gave Sam Riddle the best Christmas present ever when she officially declared him “dangerous.” Riddle will get all kinds of trim now because the ladies love danger. He has a court ruling certifying that he’s a bad boy/rebel who plays by his own rules. Mary Waters may want to invest in a new memory card for that digital camera. (DetNews)

Just in case you were wondering
According to her Facebook status, Carey Torrice is “Living the life I’ve always dreamed of…finally!” We’ve all been pulling for this plucky underdog/Macomb County’s brightest political light (whose father isn’t convicted of rape) so this is really amazing news. Also, she has to pay back that insurance settlement because of “fraud.” (Facebook, Crains)

Teachers, stop fucking your students
Look, everyone knows teaching is a thankless job and the pay is lousy. If the stereotypes are true (and we usually believe they are) probably you go home to a can of Campbell’s soup for one because no one is this ignorant state respects what you do. That said, it’s not ok to fuck your students. At least not the 12-year-old students. Once they’re 16 or 17 and can score you pot in exchange for grades, well that’s a gray area. (Freep)

Categories : State of the State

8 Comments

1

BASED ON THE JURY DETERMINATION — CAREY IS NOT A BIMBO. INSTEAD, JUST LIKE MOST GORGEOUS WOMEN — MANIPULATIVE B—–

2

I LOVE COMMENTS IN ALL CAPS!

3
One more idiot with an opinion and a keyboard
December 23rd, 2009 at 11:15 am

how about all lowercase?

4

Wouldn’t a torrid Torrice/Riddle love match make your head explode? Sex, guns, arson. Sam guiding his protege to higher office, as Macomb and Wayne county finally reach out to one another. This one has cable movie potential.

5
Oh George, not the livestock.
December 23rd, 2009 at 12:10 pm

Granholm has always seen the job of Michigan Governor as just a stepping-stone. Her strategy has been to do nothing significant and avoid any result for which she could be held accountable.

The lack of an appointment offer from Obama should have been a sign that she should actually do something to earn one. Instead, she sees the stimulus money as a chance to stay the cowardly course and create the illusion of having done something.

Granholm is truly amazing. I’ve seen good leaders and bad leaders, but I can’t think of anyone who held such a position while flat-out refusing to lead at all.

6

Carey Torrice is the personification of a living dumb blonde joke. There’s no need to add a Riddle to the equation. That would be too much of a good thing.

7

Carey Torrice is a celebrity Babe with a High IQ. There really is nothing sexier than a beautiful woman with some serious smarts. This woman is forever near and dear to my heart. Her influence and hard work brought a $20 million film studio to Clinton Twp.

8

Hi Old Guy, nice of you to comment on a six week old post. Any thoughts as to who should host the Tonight Show, Conan or Jay?

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