Apr
27

Detroit used to strive toward Zenith, now we’re slouching toward Gopher Prairie

By

“Democracy is the worship of jackals by jackasses.” – H.L. Mencken




Ok, be honest. Before last week’s very special Chris Hansen report, when was the last time you watched Dateline? What was the show topic? That’s what I thought. Let’s be coldly honest about this flapdoodle. The only reason this report was controversial, or more memorable that Hansen’s garden variety pedo-sting, is that we want to be outraged. It’s our bread and circus.

We expect as much from folks like the right Reverend Horace Sheffield (praised be His name). That’s how guys like him get paid. Find something small to complain about, and blow it up into an orgy of feigned outrage over fictional slights. This isn’t unique to Detroit. This is pretty much the modus operandi for many a professional agitator. America’s beloved tea party is the classic example.

What is unique to Detroit is how a city of (give or take) 800,000 and a metropolitan region of nearly 5,000,000 can be so easily taken by such demagoguery. Burning energy with complaints about Dateline, or Primetime Live 20 years earlier, is easier than addressing the real issues holding Detroit back.

Luther Keith published an essay about landing on Chris Hansen’s cutting room floor in the Free Press. It was interesting enough, in an academic inside baseball kind of way. WDET and The Takeaway play to the mob with their hastily planned, ham-fisted rah-rah “Dateline Do-over.” According to Time blogger Karen Dybis, Dateline proves we have a “perception problem of a massive size.”

Actually, that’s sort of accurate. We perceive Dateline as the problem. One dimwit on DetroitYES, the in-house art project for the region’s guilty white liberals, says Chris Hansen may have hurt Detroit’s efforts to lure important conventions! Our perceptions are the problem. Dateline doesn’t matter. It’s as insignificant as a grain of sand in the Sahara Desert viewed from a satellite.

What is significant? Start with the city’s $400,000,000 structural budget deficit. Then let’s move onto a metropolitan population more segregated than anything in Jim Crow’s wildest dreams. There are also great Depression-like unemployment rates across the state, and third world literacy rates in the city. We have an outdated state tax system that chips everyone’s paychecks for just enough to not pay for decent roads or affordable public universities. Anyone have a fun story about Avalon’s delicious scones? Maybe someday our outrage can be directed at real problems instead than some hairspray on a second-tier tv news magazine.

Nearly 40 years ago, Eric Sevareid gazed upon the 1972 Republican convention and used one word to describe the assemblage of delegates: middle. They were, said Sevareid, “middle class, middle aged, middle brow.” Metro Detroit can also be described in one pejorative word: small. We are small-minded, small town, and — unless we get serious about serious shit — we’ll (literally) grow smaller every day.

Categories : Jackals & Jackasses

18 Comments

1
Downriver's Friend
April 27th, 2010 at 2:56 pm

Feigned outrage is spot-on. If Dateline had done an hour-long look at the good things happening in Detroit, would anyone even being paying attention to Whore-ass or the Wrong Reverend Wendell Anthony? Those rank opportunists thrive on Detroit’s misery. Without it, they’re nothing.

2

The MAIN reason that the demagoguery exists is because the local media is so hellbent on feeding it and giving the buffoons a platform. Funny thing is that the news dweebs think they’re diligently “reporting the issues” when in reality, they’re simply unpaid PR companies for Sheffield and his ilk.

3

PRNewswire should do Detroiters a favor and cancel DABO’s account.

If the networks don’t get the feed from DABO through PRNewswire they might be less likely to report on it.

How much does someone pay PRNewswire to feed press releases to the media and beyond?
Would it be cheaper for Whore-ass to just buy himself an hour slot on the “Three Stooges” TV station for $2500.
Oh, nevermind: Adell Broadcasting might not want his whore-ass over there.

Whore-ass : PRNewswire :: sex-professionals : Craigslist.org,
(except, of course, that the sex-professionals don’t broadcast the activities of their members)

4

Reporting back…

It looks like it costs $95-$180 per submitted press release on PRNewswire.

Who paid for the trip for two to NYC, the hotel room,the press releases, etc.?
DABO? National Action Network? Galilee? Sharpton? Or maybe there’s some Kwame rescue fund with money still left in it somewhere?

Maybe we are just as bad as the lamestream media for even commenting about HSIII? Nope.
The good thing that comes from this commenting is that his people find this site on Google before they find the campaign website and the church’s website.

5

UO, I love the HSIII! Sounds like some kind of plague!

6

Great commentary.

(You know, WF, you might want to get a “Share this on Facebook” button for your posts. )

7

Sadly, this,

Metro Detroit can also be described in one pejorative word: small. We are small-minded, small town, and — unless we get serious about serious shit — we’ll (literally) grow smaller every day.

also applies to the entire state of Michigan.

8
Camille Desmoulins
April 28th, 2010 at 9:24 am

Perhaps Detroit would have instead been better off to dispatch the Insane Clown Posse duo, and their confusion over magnets, to New York rather than this particular self-proclaimed holy man. Gifts of Faygo, Better Made and Germack nuts might have swayed the network to look more favorably on our fair city, no?

http://chuckpalahniuk.net/forum/1000026/icp-f-cking-magnets-how-do-they-work

9

Emily Gail what? If we could all just say nice things about Detroit…think how different our future would be.

10

Good point, Ansel. Just think how bad things would be in Detroit right now if we hadn’t had Emily Gail or didn’t have Inside Detroit, Detroit Synergy and that art project for guilty white suburbanites!

11

Avalon has great cookies too. Isn’t that enough for you? Why do you have to ruin everyone’s perceptions about Detroit?

12

I funny thing is I really love Avalon scones. Their cookies are good too. But when how often does someone start a conversation about Chicago or NYC or Cleveland by talking about a single bakery/coffee shop? You never hear someone say: oh I love Boston because they have this one place that makes awesome brownies.

13
Unreal Detroiter
April 28th, 2010 at 8:10 pm

Some people say “there’s no place to shop in Detroit” but I beg to differ. We’ve got Honeybee and Eastern Market. That’s like 1 non-ghetto place to shop per 69 square miles!

14
Horace Sheffield
May 7th, 2010 at 4:39 pm

And the one ono-ghetto place goes to Biogotville upon your arrival, or perhaps upon news of your visit. The commentary on this website sounds like editorial notes a pre and post Klan meeting. In fact, it smacks of the racism that once most characterized this region and fostered decades of segregation. The only thing some of you don’t do is burn a cross and wear a white sheet. Of course, I wouldn’t be surpised if that wasn’t your favorite past time. By the way for answers to all of your questions make an appointment. I’d be happy to answer them.

15
Horace Sheffield
May 7th, 2010 at 4:47 pm

Oh, I’m sorry. As much as I dislike the things that are posted on this website I, unlike others who have commented here, believe it is your first amendment right. However, many of you don’t respect others right to exercise the same freedom.

Terminate his membership with PR Newswire, who paid for his trip? The fact is what difference does it make. I am free to speak, free to travel, and free to do whatever my freedom affords me. Sounds like jealously. I look forward to making you mad. You’vr gone from water hoses and dogs to internet and postings. Oh, and being God. You also know who has a relationship with God and who doesn’t. And you are the same people that prayer on Sunday and laid in the barn with black slaves on Monday. Who called on Jesus – yet rape young women and exploited black men. I’m glad I have a different God than yours, mine hand on a cross – he didn’t burn crosses like you.

16

Horace is pretty thin skinned. I mean either you goose step with him or your wearing a white sheet.

17

And, like the scoundrel he is, Horace rushes for logical fallacy (also Jeebus) when he’s been called to account for his unseemly behavior. Boo-hoo.

Hand on a cross? More like, hands in someone else’s pockets.

18

Horace Sheffield III (pbHn) lies down with dogs and then accuses people here of siccing dogs with their postings.

The right Reverend Horace Sheffield III (pbHn) just doesn’t get it. His skin color has nothing to do with comments here. It’s his self-promotion and his promotion of alleged degenerates like KMK and Sam Riddle that is offensive. And it is his pushing his daughter into politics for personal gain — once again! — but don’t even get me started on that. Oh, darn, I’ve already started on that. Well, stay tuned. Where was I? Ah, yes:

Detroiters — black, white, brown — are tired of the machine that once ran this city. Yes, Riddles-Sheffields-Waters-Kilpatricks-Cheekses-etc., you are has-beens. We are weary of you. Get lost. Your time is up.

Perhaps when Horace Sheffield III’s daughter, Mary Sheffield, loses the election to another woman of color, (which she will lose, which she will lose to a woman of color, and which she will lose to a woman who actually is qualified to be a state representative), Horace will finally realize that he and his daughter have squandered his father’s legacy.

Word to anyone who is six degrees of separation or fewer from Riddle, Sheffield, Kilpatrick, Ficano, McNamara, or Granholm: Your time is up. Get out while the getting is good. Detroiters — black, white, and brown — have had their fill of you, as the last council election so clearly indicated.

Just because folks here post something negative, but not necessarily untrue, about His Holiness Horace Sheffield III (pbHn) doesn’t make them racists. Horace Sheffield III is not EveryDetroiter, and he’s certainly not the spokesperson for my fellow oppressed brothers and sisters.

You’re not a spokesperson for the oppressed, Reverend Horace Sheffield III; you’re simply, and I mean *simply*, an opportunist who loves the spotlight on hisself (and on his daughter, Mary Sheffield for State Representative).

Get lost, Right White Reverend Horace Sheffield III: We Detroiters — yes, all of us Detroiters — have had our fill of you and all of the dogs you have lain with.

Leave a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.