Sep
21

Won’t the Real Thomas Kuettner Please Stand Up, Please Stand Up? Michigan’s Unemployed Fight to the Death for $8.15 an hour, Brighton Doesn’t Get Why Art Must Be Naked All the Time

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Today we bring you an encore performance from guest blogger week. Sally Subterfuge shares this dispatch from the Real Michigan, where Truck Nutz hang low on gun-racked pickups. Maybe you big city queers can learn a thing or two. – WF

The Victorious Warren Tea Party Attracts Results. Also White Supremacists
When the Warren Tea Party circulates a petition, it gets results. That is because it is the voice of Real AmeriKKKa. When your petition drive is this successful, does it even matter if your “chief organizer and spokesperson” is also a skeevy white-supremacist? Oh, probably not, but anyways… How is it that Michael Bertollini is 23 and yet doesn’t know how to Google his fellow patriots? Someone should show him how to work this series of tubes so that he could perhaps learn that his new BFF “Thomas Kuettner” is also probably the secretly famous “Evan Thomas,” one of the “up-and-coming leaders of a new wave of white supremacy.” Thomas-whatever-his-name-is is seen here being a pale “young Michigan dynamo” next to this evil, old, red-faced Neo-Nazi Paul Fromm, who would later give the keynote speech at Vox Nationale’s Grand Meeting to Save White America from the Brown Menace Extravaganza. And look here: Evan Thomas also has racisty things to say on the internet. Shocking. Here’s a fun example of holocaust denial:

But doesn’t the Tea Party thinks Barack Hussein Osama is Hitler? So why are you defending Hitler, Evan Thomas? (If that is indeed your real name.) I guess White Hitler = fine, but Black Hitler = Not So Fine? Sounds wishy-washy. This does not bode well for the Tea Party’s longstanding racially diverse traditions or its stance against the socialisms. [The Macomb Daily, MediaMouse]

Retail Employment Isn’t Rocket Science – Or is it?
Do you remember all those boring college courses you slept through all hung-over like “19th Century English Literary Romanticism” and “Earth’s Biology: How We’re F*ckin’ It Up?” I bet your advisor never told you this, but you probably should have listened and done well in those courses instead of slacking off because now you will probably never get a seasonal job in housewares at Target. Before the recession anyone with opposable thumbs could stock shelves and conduct hourly restroom evaluations. Not anymore: expect two hour interviews, plus a follow-up interview, copies of your college transcripts, several letters of recommendation, and extensive background checks, in addition to the standard peeing-in-a-cup. Why? It’s because Michigan is a scorched jobless Hellscape where dreams and human dignity go to die. [The Lansing State Journal]

Oh, to have Brighton’s Problems…
The Brighton City Council would like to remain stuck between a rock and a hard place forever because it feels sort of good, like climbing that rope in gym class. There is nothing stupid or shameful about it – it’s just human nature. Remember what your Sex Ed teacher taught you? But how long can the Brighton City Council last on this very important issue of the “Decision Pending” statue? Perhaps it should take some Extenze for increased endurance? Meanwhile, Brighton’s church ladies stand by to remind the townspeople that bloated naked men of stone are nothing but vulgar Not Art. Precious Moments figurines – now that’s art. And also what about the children? [The Livingston Daily]

Categories : State of the State

16 Comments

1

Wow, Sally! Now that packed a punch.

2

My truck nuts are gilded with rhinestone blingies.

3

Speaking of ovens…. this is a very funny website:
http://www.cakewrecks.blogspot.com/

4

Great, now I’m hungry for a Baby G. with a side of milk.

5

For those who would like a visual of the Brighton naked guy statue, here’s a picture I found on Flickr. It’s entirely suitable for work.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jkissnhug/2881857521/

6

Thank you for doing what I should have done, N. I was so busy being disgusted by pictures of the hateful old, Paul Fromm, and the delicate Aryan beauty of his freund, Evan Thomas, that I completely forgot to link in a Naked Guy image.

7

@N – his junk is all rusty. what can be done for that?

8

@G, a touch of rustoleum or naval jelly out to take care of the crotch rot, I think.

9

not “out” but ought.

10

Thomas Kuettner’s real name is “Evan Thomas Kuettner,” famous of the National Coalition, white supremacist and talented musician (bagpipes, Irish Flute and violin!). Also posted as “David Starr Jordan” on Stormfront.com. Army veteran!

Here’s a picture of him with Paul Fromm (white supremacist but no music talent). On the left: http://lists.canadafirst.net/pipermail/cafe-list/attachments/20091103/ae7de269/attachment-0001.jpg

11

Evan Thomas Kuettner and white supremacist “unity:”

http://www.stormfront.org/forum/t248929-9/

Originally Posted by Evan_Thomas
I hear this all the time. “Let’s all stand together,” say the disparate White nationalist groups. Easier said than done. Even if we were to “stand together,” the main question that naturally arises in such a matter is, “On WHOSE terms do we come together? What sort of tactics do we use? Who is going to be in control? What leaders will be expelled and what leaders would be put in place?” The “Commander” of the NSM believes it should be on HIS terms that we all stand together. If we were all to stand together, we all support what HE does, what people LIKE HIM do.

He said a day or so ago that anyone who is in an organization whose leaders don’t support this rally or the man in control of it should reconsider their leaders’ loyalty to our Cause. If our leaders don’t want to stand with him, then they aren’t really White nationalists. What complete nonsense.

If we come together, it will not be on the terms of the tiny minority of our “movement” that wish to imitate a fashion that is completely out of touch with the normal Americans who we are trying reach. The minority can never demand the majority to do anything unless it is put in a place of authority over the majority. And if something like that were to occur, that would mean the end of this Cause of ours along with the stifling of any potential formation of a real White nationalist movement to secure the survival and continuity of our race, led by serious, professional, respectable and responsible patriots.

If ever a day comes when every White nationalist or most White nationalists come together in one organization it will be led with intelligence, responsibility, professionalism and passion.

Best Regards,
Evan Thomas

12

And here he is again, this time with caption.

The story on this was sort of buried in the Macomb Daily piece on the petition win. I thought it very bizarre that the reporter just happened to mention it as a sidenote: Oh, by the way. Petition Spokesperson Thomas Kuettner (or whoever) is also founder of Vox Nationale, a white nationalist group. But back to the petition stuff…

You’d think that would at least merit a sidebar.

13

Kuettner? Sheeez, here he iz entertainink de white fellers with a fiddle: http://dyspathy.com/?p=4256

14

He’s like the Tevye of White Supremacist Holocaust deniers.

15

???? Oh! If I was a rich white supremacist! ?????
???? Yada yada da yada yada! ????

16

oh man i love the tea party. its like a party with more humor.