Jul
26

THERE IS NEVER A DULL MOMENT IN THIS TOWN BECAUSE SOME DUMB THING IS ALWAYS HAPPENING SOMEWHERE IN DETROIT

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Well we’re back. Let’s review what we’ve missed just so everyone is up to speed. Benny Napoleon is the new Wayne County Sheriff, replacing Warren Evans who is now the Detroit Police Chief. That was Napoleon’s old job. Crazy. Kym Worthy also said something boring about due diligence. She’s such a buzz kill, all the time with the ethics and best practices.

The bigger law enforcement news was convicted felon Kwame Kilpatrick’s inappropriate relationship of a personal nature with Sheryl Robinson Wood, the DPD’s super hot Federal monitor. Now we aren’t saying this was anything sexual but, if it was sexual, we totally understand. Who can resist the wily charms of Kwame Malik Kilpatrick, convicted felon? The man is pure, unfiltered sex. No women (save perhaps the Indigo Girls) could resist his raw animal magnetism.

And Martha Reeves, excuse us, Martha-Rose Reeves shit the bed on Flashpoint this morning. Who the hell is Tom? She also launched a campaign website that totally stole our lorem ipsum shtick. If Martha is serious about joining the on-line sensation that is publishing lorem ipsum text on the intertubes then she needs to add a picture of Beavis and Butthead. h/t: Hot Fudge Detroit’s wolf.

WJR’s Paul W. Smith is a Very Famous And Important Person. He got to be such a Very Famous And Important Person by swimming in J.P. McCarthy’s slip stream until J.P. died and Smith became a poorly Xeroxed imitation of the radio legend. Which brings us to his banal Detroit News column. Paul W. Smith is afraid Barry Sorento President Obama wants to kill the olds. Or something. Paul W. Smith is not a man who gets bogged down by “details.” Olds killing would be awful for the (once-but-no-longer) Great Voice of the Great Lakes because their listeners are all 80 and over. Where’s your birth certificate Smith? I keep mine in boards and plastic like it’s Superman #1.

And finally there was City Council poll. Charles Pugh is winning but otherwise, it paints a relatively nice scenario. Kwame Kenyatta, Brenda Jones, and Ken Cockrel look to be re-elected. Gary Brown should win. Joann Watson and Alberta Tinsley-Talabi, not so much. Martha(-Rose) Reeves may not make the November ballot. Actually a City Council President Pugh may not be so bad. Oh sure he’s winning on the star fucker vote alone but presiding over Council is like anchoring a morning chat-news fest. There’s a desk and some cameras. Plus he knows how to hit a post so they’ll be no time-wasting hymns with a Pugh-led Council. Still, plunking for Ken Cockrel isn’t the worst idea ever.

Categories : While We Were Away

1 Comments

1

Is anything going to be better than when Charles Pugh gets elected City Council president and then the city realizes he’s gay? I can’t wait for this. Unfortunately, Monica won’t be with us anymore to tell him he needs a man.

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